TEST MATCH UNSPECIAL
 
W&H 215 -8 dec

Jamie McMahon 57

Salam Zafar 52


Thames Ditton 216-7

Samad Nawaz 3-40

Man of the match Jamie McMahon

 

Hello, I am Jonathan Agnew and welcome to the edited highlights of the TMU pod cast for Woking & Horsell versus Thames Ditton.

 Jonathan Agnew (JA);  Morning Geoffrey, good morning everyone.  We are here at the W&H Park CG for their third test of the season against the much fancied Thames Ditton.  How do you see this going Geoffrey?

 Geoffrey Boycott (GB): Morning Aggers, morning everyone. Aye, don’t fancy W&H chances, picked a load of blokes I’ve never heard of, wouldn’t happen in my day. The only ones I fancy are the W&H power girls.

 

JA:                               : Yes, Geoffrey, they haven’t got a test run or wicket between them, interesting selection.

 

GB                               : Aye, don’t understand it, I know Flintoff is injured but I don’t get the modern selector, bonkers, wouldn’t happen in Barnsley.

 

JA                                : Geoffrey, toss has been made and the W&H captain, Mike Walsh has won the toss and has decided to bat, lets see if we can get a quick word with him before he straps his pads on.

 

                                    Morning Mike

 

Mike Walsh (MW)       ; Morning Aggers, Morning Boycs, morning everyone

 

JA                                : Interesting team selection. I know you have a depleted team from your previous game against Camberley?

 

MW                             ; Yeah, Aggers, it was a difficult decision; we lost players due to circumstances beyond our control, unfortunately all bowlers. Alex Marples injured himself opening a can of beer, Hussian Malik had to take his best mates cousins cat to the vets and just this morning Paul Fortescue was told by his wife that he had to put up some shelves. Fortunately, 12th Man Ben Revell was fit and ready otherwise the oppo captains 8 year old kid would have subbed fielded for us. So we’ve gone for a combination of youth and tea eaters.

 

JA                                : Thanks Mike, good luck over to CMJ & Geoffrey in the commentary box.

 

Chis Martin-Jenkins(CMJ) : Morning Aggers, Morning Geoffrey, morning everyone. Jerusalem has just finished playing. Play starts. The Thames Ditton opening bowler runs into the W&H captain and bowls the first bowl of the match. Mike shoulders & arms as it passes just outside the off stump.

 

GB                               : Lovely, really, really good cricket, nice leave down the corridor of uncertainty.

 

CMJ                            : For those without digital radio or internet access we are now off to the shipping forecast.

 

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A N Nouncer               : Fitzroy, Gale force cyclonic, Biscay showers, Dogger ruff ruff poodle…………….

 

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Simon Mann (SM)        : Afternoon Victor, afternoon Aggers, afternoon Geoffrey, afternoon CMJ, afternoon everyone, intriguing passage of play now with Jamie McMahon and Salam Zafar in.

 

Victor Marks (VM)      : Afternoon Simon, afternoon Aggers, afternoon Geoffrey, afternoon CMJ, afternoon everyone. Absolutely, Mike Walsh & Dave Bennett got W&H off to a solid but unexciting start, lets see what these two can get up to?

 

Bill Frindall (BF)           : That run has bought up the record for a W&H 3rd wicket partnership in the Fullers carnival when an Aussie beamer bowler and a nutcase keeper have batted together

 

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Henry Blofeld (HB)      : Oh I say old thing, this extraordinary cricket, afternoon Gus, afternoon Simon, afternoon Aggers, afternoon Geoffrey, afternoon CMJ, afternoon Victor, afternoon everyone. A wood pigeon has just flown over the Robin Miller tennis court stands, I say, how exciting.

 

Angus Fraser(AF)        : Yes, Blowers, yes, what about the cricket Uzman Zafar and Samad Nawaz are whacking it everyway.

 

HB                               : I say dear old thing, I know, how wonderful an Abco taxi has driven past, wonderful stuff.

 

AF                               : Careful Blowers, Samad playing, oh, hold on Mike has declared the innings at 215-8 from 48.5 overs, its now tea.

 

BF                               : Just to let you know, Andy Crawley will become the youngest W&H player to eat cocktail sausages, pizza pieces, followed by Angel cake for 3 games on a trot.  However, the Storey brothers still hold the record the most doughnuts at anyone sitting.

 

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JA                                : Fascinating 2nd innings expected, Geoffrey, W&H do not have a spinner and have picked an all seam attack; they obviously think the match will not go into the 5th hour. Rumour, has it Geoffrey that Salam may bowl spin if necessary.

 

GB                               : Aye, Aggers, just don’t get it, it wouldn’t happen in my day going into a match without a spinner. As this for this lad Salam bowling, he wouldn’t get a bowl in a Chinese restaurant.

 

JA                                : Mandar, comes into bowl from the Smithy & Moon road end, its hurried the batsman, its out, W&H are going crazy.

 

GB                               : Aye, look at them, prancing around like a ladies netball team on space hoppers, bloody Nancy boys. You wouldn’t see the Yorkshire team do that, when fiery Fred Trueman took a wicket, he would turn straight round and get ready to knock over the next man. Too excited these youngsters.

 

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CMJ                            : The W&H Barmy army are in good form and are trumpeting Great Escape, can they? Imran Tehal has bowled a beauty of ball which has a taken a thick edge and is fielded by Aruna.

 

BF                               : That touch of the ball was Aruna 50th ball he’s stopped in the field as a W&H player.

 

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SM                              : Samad is bowling well from the Charlie Johnson Becks Pavilion end, has done all season, he needs his fielders to support him.

 

VM                              : The other advantage W&H have when Samad is bowling is that he isn’t fielding.

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 HB                               : Dear old things this is exciting stuff, a song thrush has landed at deep third man, oh, and there’s a glorious red kite being flown over by the Munge swimming pool stand. Gus, old thing is there any chocolate fingers left?

 

AF                               : Thames Ditton have just won with just under 2 overs to spare and you’ve just missed it!

 

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JA                                : The TMU team have voted the Champagne moment to Dave Bennett chase of the ball past deep gully. When he went to pick the ball up he kicked it and had to do some further chasing!

 
 
 


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