Temple Bar 194-4
by Mike Walsh
A wise man once said, the many moons of Saturn shine only on those that divide the scared geode and portray the oriflamme once the heat begins" unfortunately we did not endear the sentiments of the great wise one!
Rupert the Bear, Skippy, Michael Aspel, Chorlton and the Wheelies have all registered their disquiet about our poor fielding. They are now banging big bass drum backed with Black Sabbath Marshall speakers to announce disillusionment to what amounted yet again to a WHCC loss rather than an opposition win. Taking nothing away from the oppo who batted superbly, you can't drop seven catches and expect to win.
After the fiasco of not playing at Woking Park after being assured it was ready it was a tremendous effort to get the game on at the Wheatsheaf Stadium. Several of the oppo weren't too keen mainly due to the fact that they had nine men (of which we were not aware at the time). But due to the employment of Alan Titchmarsh (Charlie) and Raphael (Trevor) we had a pitch ready for a 2.30 start and a reduced 40 over match.
After a slow start by ourselves - 28-1 off 13 overs - Trevor replaced the outgoing batsmen, myself who arguably received the ball of the match which without a shadow of doubt would have got Steve Waugh out at his grittiest best! Anyway, Trevor's intention was to get on with it straight away, crashing a 4 and a 6, before running himself out to what looked like a simple single. Batsmen came and went with Usman, looking the most comfortable before playing all around one for 23.
With the score on 98-5 from 26 overs, the teapot retrieved from the clubhouse and the 2nds already enjoying the delights of sex on the beach, it was up to Charlie Dimmock, fresh from his visit to the Hampton Court Flower Show. Charlie stroked the ball the same way as he does the club lawnmower (with no respect!) Ole Greenfingers and faisel (WHCC No.1) put on 31 in four overs which gave us a fighting chance of leaving a competitive score to bowl at. Percy Thrower hit his favourite score, 69, which culminated of 7 fours and 4 sixes, of which one went straight into the children's play area and came straight out again (Thanks Richie - Headingley - 1981) Leonardo's car was also on the receiving end of one of Chris Beardshaws master blows!
With a reasonable total set, coffee cake devoured the opening bowlers, alas Smith and Johnson gave us a good economical start but as with previous weeks, didn't reap the rewards of their efforts. Mr P Smith deservedly trapped their no 1 bat LBW giving them a score of 19-1 off 10 overs.
What's the weather going to be like Skippy? Tut Tut Tut Tut (for those who don't understand roo language the answer was... al right Bruce, the Sheila is out walking the dingo at the moment but I don't give a XXXX for any other cricket match, but strewth you lot couldn't catch a kookaburra in a birdcage!) Flippin "eck I better not ask Rupert the Bear what he thought about our fielding.
You've guessed it the drops started! With the score at 60-2, after a good caught and bowled by Constable, the team cart got stuck in its own brook and gradually the wheels began to fall off the wagon. Even though the bowling was tight chances came and went, and with the score at 96-4 we had a chance. then came a 90 run partnership which put Temple Bar back into the game and slowly out of our reach. In all seven catches were dropped and three went down off their top un scorer who finished 81 not out.
It was heart breaking after another poor day in the field has cost us so dearly. We got ourselves out of trouble batting wise due to our very own greenfingers, bowled well thanks to Charlie, Peter, Trevor and Mansoor, but directly caused our own downfall due to an unexceptionally poor fielding display. We (me included) need to stay more focused and take chances when they arise. All in all our fielding is on a par with WBC!
Lemon Tango Moment - Apart from the obvious WBC or fielding, Charlies beautiful collapse from the back of his van when attempting to get the lawnmower out of it! (5.9, 5.8, 5.9, 6.0, 6.0, 5.7, 6.0, 5.9)
Castle Moment - Charlie terrorising the local swings and slides population with his six bashing.