WHCC 182-5 - A Khan 85*

Match Abandoned

by Mike Walsh

The first recorded miracle play was performed in Dunstable in Kent in 1110 but nothing prepared me for the biggest shock of my cricketing career, the whole team at the clubhouse before the allocated meet time!  I was the last one there and I was on time.

Unfortunately the shock to the teams body clock was evident in the pre-match fielding practice, but then again it did confirm that we do not have a clue how to field.  The practice was comparable to hedgehogs dressed in Tudor sailor suits wearing concrete welly boots.  However, that may be a bit harsh to Miss Tiggy Winkle and Francis Drake who I have no shadow of doubt, if told to form a queue to the right and take it in turn to catch the ball, would not have looked blankly and walked to the left, remained still or was basically was about as much use as a space hopper that has overdosed on paprika Pringles and Bugs Bunny videos. Its no wonder we are more shocking than ten electric pylons in the field!

Obviously we scared the opposition with our dazzling fielding because when they won the toss they asked us to bat first. Myself and Andy Walker put on 55 for the first wicket which included more appeals than Terry Wogan on Children in Need!  The partnership included three big sixes from Andy and was about the few occasions the opposition keeper wasn't appealing. The partnership also included the Lemon tango moment - see below:

With the score at 62-2 off 12 overs the threatened rain started.  There was constant drizzle for about 20 overs which wasn't as annoying as Guildford's keeper (Saj) and I quickly remembered why when he was on our books he didn't get too many playing calls from me.  However, the danger was that if the rain didn't stop it would at some point become unplayable.

A good partnership between Gihan, fresh from Kiwi cake eating and Awais khan, fresh from baked bean stacking, kept the board ticking.  When Gihan departed for a Paul Hardcastle, then entered Starsky who was more reserved than a restaurant table until Saj complained that he was sworn at by him.  Starsky is to be congratulated on his restraint, bearing in mind the previous two balls, Saj kept crowing just as the ball was being delivered.

With the score around 160-4 and Awai making his fifty the rain began to get heavier and in view of this, it was decided to take early tea.  It was quite evident that Guildford didn't want to take the field again.  About half an hour later the rain eased, and we took the very optimistic view that if it didn't rain again it would be ok!  When we did start again so did the rain and play only lasted for a further seven overs until their opening bowler went flying.

Disappointing as there is little we can do about the weather but possibly this is one that has got away.  However, you must bear in mind we hadn't taken the field yet!

Lemon Tango Moment - Andy getting a top edge, and despite not knowing where the ball is, he calls for a single.  The ball has gone straight up in the air between him and the bowler so he is sent back straight away.  Andy then slips and as the bowler attempts to grab the ball for the run out, Andy belly flops to the crease just like a whale attempting to slide onto the beach trying to get to the baby seals!  Where's David Attenborough when you need him.

Castle Moment - Awais footwork whilst batting to gain a well deserved 85 after a year out from the W&H limelight.


Go to top