WEY VALLEY XI PREVIEW OF THE SEASON

2004 WEY VALLEY XI PEN PICTURES

(Due to possible legal proceedings under the Obscene Publications Act no pictures have been provided)

To preview the 2004 season profiles of the possible superstars for the forthcoming season are provided to give you a rough idea why they were selected (apart from being short of players!)

 

Mike Walsh

Role:  Supposedly skipper + Telecommunications Manager

Nickname:  Walshys brother + Fifty pence

Cricket Golden Moment:  The Monthly Phone Bill

on't Mention:  Cobhams Man eating Rabbits

 

Clive Moon

R:  Allegedly Keeper and Transport Manager

N:  The Cat (cause of his liking for Wiskas - what else!?)

CGM - Nick Moon!

DM - Edged chances

 

Des Cooke

R:  Legal advisor

N:  The Fuzz, The Plod, The Old Bill etc

CGM:  Opening the bowling for 4s first league game - what an honour!

DM:  Swag, pickpockets and arrestable grannies

 

Faizel Saleem

R: Apparently bowler

N: Morphious

CGM:  Being the only player allocated a squad number

DM: His Dads broken windows, flattened fllowerbeds and Machine Gun nest

 

Peter Smith

R:  The Team tweaker?

N:  The Stud, Smithy, Warney

CGM:  Resigning as 3rd Team Captain to play for the Carnival

DM: Pukka Pies

 

Andy Walker

R:  More of a Kebab Man

N:  Ooooooooh Jonny Jonny Wilkinson

CGM:  Moving from Aussie when the call from the 4s came up

DM:  The Beached whale impression at Guildford City. Where's Rainbow Warrior when you need it!?

 

Shazad Hussain

R:  Team Pain in the Bottom

N:  **** sake pay attention

CGM:  See below

DM: Being locked in the bog at Cheam Parish

 

Saleem Zafar

R:  Team Swearer

N:  Team Swearer

CGM:  Annoying the opposition more than his own team

DM:  Hundreds and thousands on trifles

 

Trevor Woods

R:  Youth Development Manager

N:  "Jacko"

CGM:  Providing future 1st XI players and ****heads

DM:  Scary Monsters down dark alleyways

 

Chris Murphy

R: A Murphy - like the rest of his family does sod all for the club

N:  Gribbler or Fozzy

CGM:  Exporting WHCC to the far echelons of Europe

DM:  That the wooden house of Troy was made of plastic

 

Peter Grafton

R:  Tuna

N:  Mikes boss

CGM:  Not enough room to mention, well theres............

DM:  Exeter, late nights and the haddock

 

Mansoor Suleman

R:  Playing cricket

N:  Manny

CGM:  Pulling out of the Pakistan World Cup Squad to play at the Wheatsheaf

DM:  Overpriced CurlyWurly Bars

 

Charlie Johnson

R:  Ooourrrrrhaaaaarr (whilst pointing) + bar profits contributor

N:  Couch

CGM:  Zuma and the Museum of Becks

DM:  Batsmen in black trainers

 

Rajeev Marwaha

R: Player Provider

N:  Not printable!

CGM:  Debut for the 4s

DM:  Isotopes

 

David Fowles

R:  David Fowles

N: Fowlesy or D.F. (your own suggestions please)

CGM: Making Robin Millar leave the country

DM:  The Lemon Curd incident and the Fench Horn

 

Mike Stevens

R:  Who knows, where are you!?

N:  Are you Will in disguise?

CGM:  Playing in the inaugural 4s league game

DM:  The bird of Paradise and the Bishop

 

Any information or similarities which may incriminate the above is purely intentional!

 
 
 


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